ThisMyShiznat

Usually I don’t put the actual URL right in the post, but for this one the domain name is too perfect.

I am not currently in need of her services, but if i were, I’d hire them.

This is awesome.

A swarm of bee’s unleashed their fury on an NYC video game store.  To me it looks like Union Square, which really just makes it funnier than if it had happened in Harlem or something.  I’m not really sure why but I know it’s true.

I’m sure the jokes are endless.  I will let your mind wander.

An Alaska man was declared the winner of the World Beard and Mustache Championship.

I came across this article with much detail about the competition and about the beard.  Call me critical (Critics judge, Cynics hate), but the report is useless without the only thing I really care to know about it.  A Picture.

I was able to do a little bit of investigative reporting, and I came up with the photos from the event.  While the snowshoe beard was in fact very impressive, but “Best beard”?  The guy with the white three-dementional mutton chops would’ve gotten my vote.

*Photo’s not supplied.  I am reporting on the article that I read, not the event it’s self*

Two stories in the news have caught my eye.

First there was the 13 year old boy who is refusing treatment for “Chest Cancer” despite a court order.  To avoid chemotherapy treatment, 13 year old Daniel  is running from the law with his mother.   The court has issued an arrest warrant for the two but they haven’t been seen for a few days.

Next, we have the story about an  11 year old girl who recently died of diabetes.  The girl went into a coma due to “Untreated Diabetes”, though the news reports do not specify if it was undiagnosed, or if the parents were aware of the condition.  The little girls mother is apparently very religious and was found guilty of  “Second degree reckless homicide” for not providing the daughter with proper medical treatment.

To me, these stories are nearly identical, which strikes me as odd.  Both children, both inflicted with a deadly but highly treatable medical condition.  Both do not recieve treatment.

I know the song is 15 years old now, but have you ever thought about the chorus?
What are they trying to say?
Has anyone ever spent time actually figuring it out?
Did the band even have a clue what they were saying?

• Girls who are boys
• Who like boys to be girls
• Who do boys like they’re girls
• Who do girls like they’re boys
• Always should be someone you really love

I actually wrote it down. I tried to make sense of it. I got to the third line before I got too confused to keep going. I started to realize that each line can mean more than one thing, depending on inflection and interpretation. In reality (which I am very familiar with thank you) the chorus is really a lot like a “Choose your own adventure” story.  Luckily, I love choosing my own adventures!  Sometimes I let other people chose my adventures for me. That can be a lot of fun too.

Here it goes. This may not be complete.  Choose one meaning for each lyric and you will have a personalized chorus. There are at least 16 possible combinations and they are all very strange.

Girls who are boys - Could mean…

Actual females who act like boys
OR
Actual boys who act like girls

Who like boys to be girls - Could mean…

They like boys who act like girls
OR
They like to replace boys with girls

Who do boys like they’re girls – Could mean…

They have sex with boys as a female would
OR
They have sex with boys as if the boys were female

Who do girls like they’re boys – Could mean…

They have sex with girls as a boy would
OR
They have sex with girls as if the girls were boys

Always should be someone you really love - Could mean…

You can only catch it once
AND
Get yourself checked just in case

*I have used these lyrics without express permission from EMI, Food Records, Blur, or anyone else. Also, I copied and pasted the lyrics from a popular site and I didn’t get permission from them either.*

Experience my apartment!

You may be asking yourself, “Why would I want to pay a small entrance fee to experience your apartment?”.

Yup those crazy brits have done it again.

This Video is making the rounds right now.  It appears to be shot with a cell phone camera, depicting a high school student giving birth on the soccer field.  The first time I watched it I was very confused until i realized it is obviously not real.  (Note that I did not use the term “fake”)  The second time I watched it, I couldn’t stop laughing.  Are the kids cheering her on?  I swear I can hear them chanting “Go! Go! Go!” like she is finishing off the beer bong or something.

I wonder if it was a boy or a girl?  Either way, it’s probably a good candidate for welfare.  I’m just sayin’.

I remember back in the late 90’s and early 2000’s when Google was all the rage because of their innovative and successful business model.  They were all the rage.  When internet users went to www.google.com all they saw was an empty white page with a box to type in what you were looking for, and a search button to click.  How could this company possibly be making any money?  It’s just a blank white page?  The answer was, and still is, through advertising revenue.

After a series of recent, wide spread outages affecting the companies infamous collection of services like “gmail”, “google search”, “google apps”, and “google make me coffee in the morning”, I think this is the last piece I need to convince people of my “Google is evil” theory.  Essentially, my theory is as follows…  “Google is evil”

http://yro.slashdot.org/article.pl?sid=09/05/16/1142230

I wanted to coin the phrase “Googlemarking” for the technique described in the above article, but interestingly enough a google search for “googlemarking” brought me to http://www.googlemark.org which, interestingly enough is clearly under the not for profit .ORG domain, and also has a disclaimer which reads  :

“Googlemark.org is not in affiliation with Google Inc..
Last googlemark #2238: Medicalchemy 3 days ago”.

The little (G) copyright symbols strike me a pure irony.
Is a new type of internet trade marking in the near future?

Since its only been around for 10 years, thats why the US is so far behind.  I think China invented their internet something like a billion years before….

http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,519187,00.html

For years I have been ASTOUNDED by how crappy government run websites
are, and amazed when their applications work at all.  I honestly never
put much time into it, because I assumed they were relying on security
through non functionality.  seriously I did.

Now I understand why medical records are all done with paper.  Because
if my Dr cant track down my medical history, then some 17 year old in
Hong Kong doesn’t have a chance.

It seems to me that the US government is having a serious “Oh sh*t”
moment with internet security.  Congress uses powerpoint to print out
presentations on posterboards, then they use video camera’s to record
the presentation and display it on plasmas in the room.  Is this
really the best we can do?

I award them -3 wampum.  I will include that charge on my 2009 tax return