ThisMyShiznat

I looked at my Homer Simpson Chia Pet Time Lapse tonight and noticed that was ‘allegedly’* the 999th viewer.

A few months back I got a Homer Simpson Chia Pet.  Having prior Chia Pet experience on my resume, I already knew that they leak like a siv and i figured painting it would keep the water in.  I picked out a nice enamel paint, which was Homer Simpson yellow.  The water leaked through the terracotta pot and separated the paint from the pot, which formed as bubbles in the paint.  A few modifications later and I got the pot to hold water without leaking at all, and the paint didn’t bubble anymore.  Having gone this far, I wanted to make the Chia Pet completely self sustaining.  I didn’t want to be watering it at all, I just wanted it to grow.

I figured if I was going to go so far as to get a fish tank pump involved, I needed something more than the satisfaction of watching it grow once.  Thats where the photographs come in.  I started looking in to time lapse photography a little bit, and I found a few solutions, but nothing that would record for anything more than a few hours at a time.  This thing is gonna take 6 weeks to grow.  Resetting the camera every three hours doesn’t sound appealing when I already have a fish tank pump keeping Homers head full of water 24 hours a day.

More on that later.  Don’t let the suspense keep you awake at night.

* I say allegedly because I’m not entirely sure how that number gets updated, but it doesn’t seem to happen in real time.  Maybe it does it every few hours or something.

A video posted on youtube a few days ago shows a mysterious creature living in a South Carolina sewer pipe.

Now the video is a little hard to see at first, and for the first 30 seconds or so, I honestly thought I was looking at something NSFW.  No further details available on my mistake.  Just to clarify for you, what you are seeing is a mysterious blob attached to a joint in the sewer pipe.  After about 35 seconds, the camera rotates left and you can see down the pipe.  (which I also seriously thought was something else).  The camera goes down the pipe a little ways and rotates left again to show another one of these mysterious blobs affixed to another joint in the pipe.

*Warning.  This video may cause nausea.  Please, do not induce vomiting.”

I can’t say for sure how big these creatures are because I have no idea how big the pipe is, and have nothing to reference it to, but I like to think that the pipe is 10 feet in diameter, making the blobs an estimated fucking huge in size, and clearly capable of world domination.

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An ABC report claims that the mysterious creatures are a colony of tubifex worms. I’m suspicious, but on a related note, I’m skeptical too. Also, for a third point, I’m hopeful that the blobs will let me join forces with them once they emerge from the sewer to take over the planet.

The video below claims to show a colony of tubifex worms “in the wild”.  The reflection showing the canon digital camera in the aquarium glass adds true credibility to the video.  I’m not saying the video doesn’t show tubifex worms, I’m just saying it could have been more accurately labeled and that they look nothing like the first video.

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I don’t care what it is.  I’m going to be sure to keep following my mantra of “Don’t shit where you eat”.
You know,  just in case.

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